Have you ever wondered whether other people are judging or evaluating you based on what you drink? Well, they are. Especially bartenders. On her blog, “Are You Wearing My Pants?” one bartender puts it bluntly: “When you order a drink, I judge you.” Sometimes I feel like the bartender knows what I’m going to order before I even order it. 40-something mom? Check. A little tentative around the eyes? Wine.
Who Hillary Clinton truly is: A drinker of hard liquor
So what does the fact that I’ve ordered the same basic thing (in summer and spring, a glass of white wine; in winter and fall, a glass of red) for years, any time I go to a bar, say about me? P.S. I’m also the person who ordered the same flavor of ice cream all through childhood, any time I walked into a Baskin and Robbins (mint chip). My own informal and completely unscientific interpretation says it means I’m risk averse, drawn to comfort and routine, and I’m a homebody. All true.
So what do others think? Here’s a snippet from “Are You Wearing My Pants?” (the bartender’s blog mentioned above)—“a list of common personality traits and characteristics” based on drink orders:
“Stella: You are foreign…or are trying to appear to be.
Vodka Cran: You don’t know what you want in life, or at this bar.
Gin & Tonic: $$$
Red Bull & Vodka: You are an asshole.
Pinot Grigio: You are approaching menopause faster than you think.
Who Hillary Clinton is trying to be: A laid-back beer drinker
Vodka Martini: You had a serious day at work, or you are a functional alcoholic.”
The writers at coed magazine have their own take. Mind you, the magazine is targeted to college age kids, but their assessments are kind of fun, and I think they apply to any age drinker.
“If you’re a wine drinker, you’re very social, but prefer to go to parties where you can actually talk to the person next to you.”
And if you like domestic light beer? “You like to yell. You like to yell in groups…The light beer drinker is the beer game champion. You are always up for a game of beer pong…Your life revolves around quantity. Who cares if it tastes like watered down piss because you could drink a million of them. If you like regular domestic beer, “you used to be an athlete.”
Is vodka your drink of choice? Then you’re versatile, and drink according to the time of day and your moods.
Do you gravitate to Bloody Marys? Then, sadly, according to coed magazine, “You are a true alcoholic who knows the number one rule of alcoholism. You need to bite the hair of the dog that bit you. There isn’t a time of day that you wouldn’t rather be drinking.”
Rum Straight? “You’ve never had rum, or you’re a pirate.”
What kinds of personalities do you associate with different drinks? Did you ever order a drink you didn’t want just to enhance your image? We’d love to hear from you in the comments section below.
I have to say, I hate the attention Hillary Clinton has gotten for drinking with her staffers. Who cares? If she’d gotten a DUI, that’s be a whole other thing. But that aside, what we drink says a little about who we are, but not too much. It’s fun to put yourself in a category and sometimes to try to guess what categories others would go into, but we all end up defying expectations, which is basically what you’re saying, since you posted two very different interpretations of the kind of person who orders vodka.
Drinking is a very complex issue. It could begin at early age with an innocent drink here and there. As life goes on and the party fever rages on as well, it could become an addiction. Sex and alcohol mix very well indeed. My advice to “prospective drinkers“ is to stay away from drinking as much as possible, as once an addiction has taken place, it is very, very, difficult to get rid of, although not impossible.